I kept wandering, looking around
Something that would ease my pain

I didn’t know what to look for
or to recognise it

I sought alone,
people exagerated madness

I sought freedom,
away from chains and boundations

I sought release
a burden of expectations on my shoulder

And yet I couldn’t see
it was fear ruling me

Looking over my mistakes
Blaming all others
I expected some magic
To pull me out of chaos!

Lost Happiness

I reached home to silence
Unusual calm, peace
I wondered,
Howcome there’s no noise;
No mischief being played
I searched the garden,
The whole house
And everything empty
Worried, I wonder
When was the last she remained in
Never quite at a place
I find her in bed
Temperature, discomfort
And there goes my heart
To hear her chirp again


Fondling her, caressing
Praying silently under my breath
Reminding myself, recalling
His mercy, His wisdom
I tell her how
He purifies us by pain
Tests the pious
With trials
Yet, I was speechless
When in her innocence, she asked
“What sins would He write off me
And why this trial?”
My helplessness couldn’t be more profound


I remember a time
When the prospectus of certain people
Got me blabbering about stuff
Random, vague and sometimes thoughtful
Now even with some good listeners around
I rarely speak up
Somewhere I lost myself.


Seeking help and crying foul
I kept blaming for my turmoil
And yet, when I could see
I didn’t bother to correct me

I cried pain, sorrow, grief
it all just doesn’t fit in
But I didn’t bother to rectify
thing I found when I looked inside

I cried hopeless, seeking
as if they had all, I none
and yet, when I looked within
didn’t find a thing lacking

I victimised myself for sympathy, maybe
some care, attention
and yet, at the end of the day
besides me was alone