Half a year I couldn’t talk to you…
I dread a conversation now that I can.
I got no answer for how I am
Or have been all this while.
I am reduced to be a memory
No one knows I still exist
I have no words anymore
I falter at your questions
Grope around to find words
But all is dark and I find none
I run away!
Remember the last time you said mother? Parent? Care? Oh! So much of concern. How you should be aware of their feelings, and how our lives should revolve around them? Remeber saying they should be the centre of our world? The very thing that we should be constantly aware of? Careful of? Mindful of?
Remember saying that our lives should be dedicated to their care, paying them back for what they did for us as children? Remaining indebted and trying to make things even. More out of the intent to repay their favours rather than out of gratitude…
Why could they not understand that gratitude is not always shown by doing as the other asks. Gratitude is not giving someone control over your life. Gratitude is doing something for that other person out of your own personal will. The way you want to.
But when it comes to giving up control and freedom; when they ask to specifically take instructions and do whatever they say, this is not paying back or showing gratitude. This is enslavement. Under the worst pretext available.
There is a great difference between gratitude and slavery.